There is a side of motherhood that rarely gets talked about. What about the times that are difficult? What if your child has left you estranged? That once adorable baby that you couldn’t live without has decided they are better off without you? Where did you go wrong? Being a parent is never easy, but when you are estranged from your children, it almost adds a new level of difficulty, that is difficult to navigate.
Your love for them isn’t any different. Your heart feels empty and alone. It’s not easy to say, but it does happen. You aren’t alone. As parents, we do our best. Most of us do anyways. The struggle is real. Often we try to correct the mistakes that we think our parents made, only to find out they were probably right. We try to infuse responsibility with the right amount of independence, but sometimes it is difficult to know the line.
My advice, talk to a therapist or someone that can give you honest feedback. Be open to the truth because it hurts. As adults, we tend to relive our traumas. Be ready to deal with that. Eventually, your child will have to deal with that as well.
Also, never give up. When I say never give up, it doesn’t mean boundaries be damned. It means discovering ways to deal with what is going on in a healthy way. Keep presenting healthy ways to communicate and get through difficult issues. Even if they don’t want to hear it. It is helpful to have people to talk to about it, just make sure that you are getting something out of the conversations. Blaming behaviors and drama is not the way to go.
Setting healthy boundaries with adult children – https://youtu.be/7foVv_ftSIg